Bazmanian Devil

So, before I go to bed tonight, I must turn off my current phone, and when I wake up in the morning, I will be able to turn on my new one. New phone, new chapter. And in light of the fact that I already lost my most of my saved texts, I figured that I should try to record the ones I remember and still have before I forget them for good. So allow me to apologize for this whole post being very self-absorbed, but I don’t want to forget everything that got me through these past two years.

Nate- Aww, I miss you. It’s hell a mile high

Zack Royle (aka Kathy)- You,re hot

Elizabeth- I just wanted to tell you that you dressing up to Twilight is just like me and handjob Bill being a ging

Amanda- Okay, well I love you and I want to be there for you still!

Nick- You’re great. Truly the best. Better than Mr. Moore: used car salesman with a 86% closing rate due to intrusive business practices.

Emily- Stephanie Irene, you are an amazing, beautiful, intelligent, stylish, strong person. Any guy who can’t see that doesn’t have a penis.

Elizabeth- dfjskjfs OMFG. SHE IS SOOO HOTT. (Referring to Emma Watson)

Kathy- Honey, you looked so beautiful today. You have an elegance and grace that isn’t cut out for high school boys, I can’t wait to meet the boy who finally has the balls to pursue you.
And many other encouraging things from Kathy, reminding me how strong I am when I need it most.

Many a thing from Diane-Jo encouraging me to stay strong and to enjoy my fufilled life.

Madre- You’re my best friend sweetie, and you don’t know how lucky that makes me feel.

Parker- You’re seasoned brisket because you’re not only delicious, but also spicy. Hence the seasoned.

Melissa- His nipple piercings were infected with god knows what, and well, ginges, we all know about them.

Amanda- Just remember: YOU ARE AN ASIAN MALE.

Texts from Erika as our friendship developed.

Maisie- I’m thankful for you, Steph. You are such a strong woman with an incredibly bright future. You always bring a smile to my face. I love our gossip coffee dates :) Thank you for putting up with all my shenanigans throughout french. Theres no one else I’d rather bash mormons or hit on coffee shop workers with <3

Erika- Awwwww steph :((( Whata loser. You dont need him to explain anything. Its his loss.

Nick- I just got back from Oklahoma today, and that was the most thoughtful letter anyone’s ever given me. It was by far my favorite Christmas gift. Thank you so much Stephanie :) You’re my favorite person to discuss life with.

Semester’s over. I lived though a very stressful, very cranky week, and I have to say, overall I am pleased with how everything has panned out.

Everything started out pretty bleak. I had just finished one of the best summers of my life, and I was most definitely not ready for all that to end and bring with it the responsibility and obligations of school. It didn’t seem like it’d be too bad though, I had decent people in all of my classes, nothing with Nick, but I spent 3/4 of every day with Emma, so it was looking good. I can’t think of anyone else I would rather have all my classes with than Emma; even though we’re not best friends, she’s a very easy person to get along with, very considerate, and just as cynical and cranky as me. We made a good pair. I was pretty excited about my classes too, at the beginning. Tennis wasn’t all that great though, C-team still didn’t have a coach, but I still had Trisha and Sara, my classic tennis girls! Plus Erika and Lindsey and we were shaping up into a nice little group.

Slightly later, I was starting to feel the weight of my insecurities. Hiding it well though. Just the occasional meltdown to my mom or Kathy when someone brought up Cole. Especially when Emily would tell me about how they were talking about me and then insinuate how much better she is than me. That friendship started to fizzle.. At the same time, I started to become closer to Erika, and Aditya and I were entering one of our grand getting along phases. Talking in ‘we,’ goofing off, being honest with each other, not trying to always one-up the other. Tennis was phenomenal. MelaDee came in as coach, Trisha, Sara, Erika, Lindsey, and I (aka ‘The Bitches’) basically ruled the team. Always checking out the soccer boys or Brett. Yelling at gingers (Ginger Mason, mostly but sometimes Heath). And of course TWEEGS FOR LYF3. The soccer games were quite possibly the absolute best things ever. We yelled whatever random thing we could think of with our limited soccer knowledge (okay, it was really only me yelling). Carbing up all the time too. “I mean, we’re running a marathon tomorrow” Started going on dates with Trisha: first I surprised her with the batting cages, then she surprised me with a candlelit dinner at her house. Went to SlutWalk, pretty much decided from that point on that I would be as vocal about my feminism as I wanted. What a moving experience. And I am so glad I got to spend it with Kathy, Kara, and my mother. My favorite proud sluts. And my mom and I found about about the KC Atheist Coalition there! Didn’t go to Homecoming, spent the evening with Diane-Jo first and then with Amanda. Much better. And now I’ll just have a random formal dress ready.

Later, started working, started stressing. Marcia’s class was killing me. Not in difficulty, but just in unorganized work allllll the time. I was missing Kara and Kathy, we didn’t get very much quality hangout time. Started hanging out with Erika more, and we formed a sort of friend group there for a bit. Had a couple of shindigs at my house. Was keeping in good touch with Elizabeth and Amanda, not so much with Rachel. Having a lot of good chat time with Maisie, god that girl is so impressive. I don’t care how many people don’t like her; she is one of the most accomplished women I know while still being a kind and funny friend. Dysfunctional date with Melissa. Always chatting with my mom. Always. Cole started talking to me. Commence emotional breakdown. Slowly collected myself, all while the world decided to hate me and make me keep running into him randomly. As I stopped being upset, I got mad; I decided I needed to yell at him. So I did. (See: Holy Weekend Batman) All uphill from there.

Semi-recently, getting busy. Trying to balance everything. Starting to worry about finding colleges, impressing colleges, paying for colleges. Soccer season ended, so I started rekindling my friendship with Nick. I’d missed our wonderful conversations. Lots of coffee dates. Lots of homework. Lots of TV. Went to Skepticon with my mom, which is always a wonderful weekend. We have wonderful chats the whole way there and back, and in between I get the atheist passion I needed rekindled. And I finally decided to start an SSA chapter at my school. So glad I’m starting to find my place. Thanksgiving weekend with Amanda was wonderful. Did community service with the KC Atheist Coalition on Thanksgiving morning. And then Amanda and I basically spent the entire rest of the weekend wrastling and goofing off. Occasionally feeding each other roasted marshmallows. And I took Trisha on an ice-skating, lunching, and Plaza shopping date. Going into December, I was exhausted, but feeling optimistic and determined to make the most of this year.

Recently, I’m allllllways cranky. Working way too much. Just ready to be done with everything and have some free time to myself, and Amanda, and Elizabeth. Quit really having any free time for random funtivities with Erika. Celebrated a fabulous birthday with my mother. And now Amanda’s finally here, we’re right in the swing of things. Doing impressions of my dad, talking about Twilight, and cackling all the time while annoying everyone around. And the semester turned out for the best, I mean, I really didn’t ever have a reason to stress about my grades, they were always sturdy, but that’s never stopped me. I am excited to for Christmas and New Years and some quality bonding time with Elizabeth and Amanda. I need to get back on my December goals though, mostly the reading and the dance class. And I’m excited to go back to school and have French, but holy hell, J’ai oublie tout. I’ll still have classes with Emma and my birthday will be swiftly approaching. A couple of good concerts too. Needless to say, even though I’ll be sad to end break, I think 2012 could be pretty great.

In the midst of finals and I couldn’t be happier. Granted, I’m also not getting anything done, but it’ll get done eventually. Bonding time is more important.