If only Baz Luhrmann directed my life.
Stephanie Irene. KC girl. Feisty. Feminist. Neurotic. Atheist. Passionate. CATS!
Oh goodness. It’s been ages. Since school got out, I’ve been in a crazy whirlpool of trying to balance friends, family, work, fucking summer school gym, and staying sane. It’s been a good one so far, with a few complaints, but when don’t I have those?
Summer school is basically the worst experience of my life. All it seems to me is a giant waste of time, cause for loss of sleep, and yet more proof of how stupid everyone in the world is (or at least the incoming freshman).
Friend-wise, I know I should be happy. But there are so many things that aren’t just perfect like I want them to be. I hate that Trisha and Katie and Drew are leaving. I hate that Diane-Jo isn’t even here and Parker is quasi-sickly so he can’t do a ton. I hate that my work schedule conflicts with everyone else’s. I haven’t seen Kathy enough. Nick has been basically absentee. Melissa was in stupid Sri Lanka all month. And Elizabeth wasn’t here long enough and when she was, we were always on her mom’s schedule. I have great friends, and I have already done so many great things with them this summer and am looking forward to so many more (like the great, silly summer bucket list Katie, Drew, and I made), but now June is already over and it feels like there’s too much left to do. I would really like for this summer to be as great as last year. And I’m just not in the same place.. last year I was ready for anything: full of naivete and all the blissful ignorance that comes with it. Now, I want all the same fun, but I’m looking for different things. I’m at the point where maybe it’s be nice for my fake boyfriend to actually be a real one. I’ll just have to wait and see on that one, not another one of my strengths. And I’m so unbelievably disillusioned with Nick. What a turd he’s become. He’s not the same at all anymore, and I have no interest or time to continue cultivating a relationship with this ‘bro’. But really though, I am so excited to be coming together again with Kathy, glad to have Melissa back, happy to be exploring a new brand of funtivities with Erika at the wheel, looking forward to more pseudo double dates with Trisha, and ready to complete the summer bucket list. All the while, I am sort of excited to have found a couple of older friends at UMKC that will be good to keep around. Really though, I love my friends, I shouldn’t complain.
It’s been a great summer with my fam. Seeing Coldplay with them in Dallas was so wonderful (not to mention how great it was to let my inner Texan sass run wild). Once again, anticipating Amanda’s arrival stressed me out, and yes, there are things I wish I didn’t have to miss out on while she was here, but goodness, all of our time together was perfect. Stalking Jason Grill and eying the Sporting KC team. Vegging out and showing Katie the KC essentials. All of it was great. We have to all end up together.
College stresses the shit out of me. I don’t even know where to begin. But like, do I want a small school or a big school? Do I want to be a plane ride or a car drive away from home? Do I want a college or a university? How the hell do you pick one place that alters your whole life?
I don’t even think it’s possible to sum up how amazing the concert was last night. I really do think that Snow Patrol is my favorite band. I can barely even think of a single lyric of theirs I wouldn’t get tattooed on my body. Nor can I even express how unbelievably perfect Gary Lightbody is. If I could pick any one person in the whole world to sing to me, it would be him. And this is even with him having vocal problems last night (which he worked though so seamlessly anyway). And I love the way he talks about Kansas City. Because there are few people that see Kansas City as the beautiful assemblage of culture that I do. The whole evening was just perfect, and such a great way to break up all sorts of gross stress.
This is all I ever wanted from life.